Si'ar Siyu's Webplace

Author: Si’ar Siyu

  • endless loop

    transcription:

    reflections of the mind
    the mind wandering
    wandering through dark tunnels
    dark tunnels leading nowhere
    nowhere to be found
    to be found in this life
    in this life existing
    existing in dreams
    dreams forming a rainbow
    a rainbow with a pot of gold
    a pot of gold at the end
    at the end to be able to see
    to see reflections
    reflections of the mind
    …

    With thanks to a rhyming snail for help with the infinity loop.

  • Review week 52/2025

    Grateful

    • Over the holidays I got time for a longer, much needed resting period.

    Failure

    • Although knowing I needed the rest I still beat myself up for it because I’ve made nearly no progress with my study program assignments.

    Take Away/Doing Next

    • Keeping up relaxation routines while also trying to accept that I still need more time to rest.
    • Combining the last day of the year with the November/December 2025 evaluation. Also at the beginning of 2026 publishing a little review and evaluation of 2025 together with an outlook for 2026.

  • family gathering haiku

    coming together
    talking, laughing, having a good time
    being present

    — ideally

    sitting in the corner
    watching everyone enjoying themselves
    feeling overwhelmed

    — reality

  • holiday tree

                *
               / \
              / o \
             /_~ ~_\
            O / # \ O
             /~ ~ ~\
            / o | o \
           /_~ ~ ~ ~_\
          # /o  O  o\ #
           /~ ~ ~ ~ ~\
          /#  # | #  #\
         /~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~\
        /_o__o_ o _o__o_\
       O    O |   | O    O
              |___|

  • because it is Christmas

    we must buy presents
    because it is Christmas
    we must come together
    because it is Christmas
    we must keep smiling
    because it is Christmas
    we must be pleasant company
    because it is Christmas
    we must keep up the facade
    because it is Christmas
    we must avoid conflict
    because it is Christmas
    we must be relaxed and perfectly fine
    because it is fucking Christmas

  • distracted definition

    footnote distraction
    … a distraction at the end of a page like a comment or an afterthought

    tiny distraction
    … a distraction that comes and goes but has no real impact

    small distraction
    … a distraction that is modest but keeps coming with its demands

    medium distraction
    … a distraction that is well done

    large distraction
    … a distraction that is worthy to be considered serious

    huge distraction
    … a distraction that is basking in its magnificence

    giant distraction
    … a distraction that in its vastness defies every definition

    cosmic distraction
    … a distraction that in its extent downgrades everything else to a footnote distraction

  • Review week 51/2025

    Grateful

    • I’m glad to have people in my life I can ask for advice and/or help.

    Failure

    • My responsibilities together with the upcoming deadlines are putting massive pressure on my shoulders.

    Take Away/Doing Next

    • Working steadily on my study assignments over the holidays while also taking some time off.

  • hungry dragon

    One little dragon with

    two heads eating

    three cakes,

    four cheesecakes,

    five tarts,

    six fairy cakes/cupcakes,

    seven brownies,

    eight doughnuts and

    nine cookies, sitting before

    ten empty plates.

  • Me3

    past me
    present me
    future me
    past me
    made choices
    present me
    is dealing with
    the consequences
    present me
    is making decisions
    future me
    is going to live
    with the outcomes
    past me never existed
    so who was past me
    to choose for
    present me?
    future me is never going to be
    so who is future me
    present me is
    setting the path for?
    I am present me
    the only me
    that truly ever exists

  • out of order

    shattered
    broken
    in pieces
    no clue
    can't repair
    worthless seams
    torn apart
    scattered
    fragments
    dissolved
    not to be fixed